Nighty Night

This is what the last two nights have looked like at our house. When we brought Amelia home from the hospital we didn't have a crib. So, we improvised and let her sleep with us. It's not that we are regretting it. The situation actually kinda works for us. When I was getting up every morning before 6am to go to school I just didn't have the energy to fight with her. It was also convenient for breast feeding. When she woke up to feed, she was right there and we both would go back to sleep easier because of not having to fully wake up.

I've been told we are going to regret it and that babies need routine/a schedule. Since summer time means waking whenever I choose, I have decided to work on this. We are not on a 7pm bed time. That just isn't our life style right now. We don't have a constant babysitter which makes it hard to create a routine that early. I have been getting her to bed by 10pm most nights. I thought starting a routine at that time would be a good start. We take a bath every other night, put on her pjs, then read a book and I sing to her while she nurses.

This worked the 1st night but last night not so much. I sang to her for over an hour, until I ran out of soft slow songs to sing. Finally about half an hour before midnight I laid her in the crib half asleep and let her "cry it out." HARDEST. THING. EVER. seriously. I was literally sitting on the couch willing myself to stay there while all I wanted to do was run up the stairs and comfort my little girl. She eventually cried herself to sleep. She slept a whole 3 hours before waking up to eat and we started all over, only this time I didn't make it. She ended up in our bed the rest of the night.

Tonight went better and I am going to be strong when she wakes up to eat this time. Curtis says the neighbors are gone for the summer (they're students) and so I don't have to worry that she is keeping anyone up. I'd like to say that this is making me get better sleep but it's not. I worry all night, imagining SIDS and other uncontrollable tragedy, but eventually I think I might.